Archives June 2025

by Ima Phibber

Back in my day, tv commercials were clever and funny. But, that has changed. Now, many tv commercials are not funny, and they’ve become inappropriate for kids. You commonly hear cursing in tv commercials. Sex sells, so you see many sexually suggestive and risque commercials. You also see some commercials promoting homosexuality, transgenderism, and promiscuity. All this is hard to swallow for parents trying to raise their kids to be good God-fearing normies.

Valley tech entrepreneur, Mark Bezos, has decided to do something about it. The SRVO recently wrote a story about his new AI marriage program called Bliss. Bezos said, “In normal conversations over the past year or so, I’ve heard a lot of parents complaining about how inappropriate tv commercials are these days for their kids. I haven’t really thought about it; all my kids are grown now except Mark Jr. who is 18 months old. I started paying more attention to commercials, and those parents are right. Some commercials are awful these days, so I decided to help these parents out.”

The app is called AdCloak. The basic version allows parents to choose categories of commercials that they’d like to screen; categories include cursing, sexually suggestive, and more. The premium version allows users to also screen commercials from specific companies/organizations. The basic version is $1.99 per month, and the premium version is $3.99 per month. Bezos has negotiated agreements with all the major streaming services including YouTubeTV and SlingTV, and he has also negotiated an agreement with Roku. Bezos said, “It was a long process negotiating with these companies, but I managed to get it done. There’s still some work to do, and we plan to improve AdCloak going forward.”

Parents are very pleased so far with AdCloak. One mom said, “Yay! Now, I don’t have to constantly be on guard while we’re watching tv. In the past, I had to have the remote ready to change the channel every time a commercial came on, but AdCloak has taken care of that. I’ll gladly pay $1.99 per month for it.” One dad said, “We started out with the basic version, but we recently upgraded to premium. I can now screen out all the pharmaceutical company ads! No more Progressive and Liberty Mutual ads too. Sorry Flo and stupid emu! I love AdCloak! I wish we’d had it sooner.”

Viewers see a blank screen with music when an ad is blocked, but most viewers don’t have an issue with that. Many users say their kids get annoyed by it. One mom said, “My 4 year old twins don’t like the blank screen, but it’s better than them learning to cuss or singing pharmaceutical drug ad jingles.”

AdCloak has seen huge growth, and it doesn’t appear to be slowing down anytime soon. It will be interesting to see what new features it adds in the future.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

Pickleball mania has taken over these days. Valleyans have had to travel outside The Valley to play until recently. Strong River Bend has 2 tennis courts at the city park that have not gotten much use in years. Multiple people petitioned the city to convert those tennis courts to pickleball courts, and that project was completed about 5 weeks ago. Pickleball players have been using the courts daily since the conversion.

It’s great that the courts are being used, and it’s great that more people are visiting the park. But, a problem has emerged between the senior citizen players and the teenage players. Most of the senior citizen players have been playing early in the morning to avoid the heat, and teens have been playing later in the evenings. Recently, some of the senior citizen players have started playing in the evenings, and that has taken up a lot of court time for the teens.

There have been reports of some yapping back and forth between the two groups recently, but things got heated this Tuesday night. Police were called after an altercation between an older man and teenage boy. Witnesses said the two were began arguing over the older gentlemen and his playing partner not leaving the court in a timely manner. It soon got heated, and the two were face to face yelling at each other. Luckily, the situation was diffused and no one was arrested.

A senior citizen male witness said, “These young punks have to learn to be patient. They don’t own the place. Us old folks have been paying taxes here for decades, and we should have first dibs on the courts. Kids these days don’t respect their elders. If these youngsters don’t like it, get over it. Plus, all they wanna do is clown around and do videos for social media. We could settle this by playing a match, mano a mano, but they don’t want none.”

A teen witness added, “Look, these old guys should play in the mornings. They get up at like 5:00 am anyway. Us teenagers should get to play in the evenings. The old guy started it by running his mouth; we were ready to play, but we didn’t say anything. Those guys are mean and ruthless. It’s just ridiculous that they think they can play all the time, and they think they don’t have to share the courts.”

Because of the incident, Strong River Bend is now requiring players to reserve court times by the hour. Also, the police will have be patrolling the park more often in the evenings to deter any future incidents. It’s unfortunate the two contingents can’t get along, but hopefully things can get worked out soon.

by Heeza de Seaver

Kids loving going to summer camp. Whether it’s church camp, baseball camp, or Camp Ayntnocissy, kids look forward to them each summer. Valley farmer, John Farmer, has created a unique camp on his farm this summer. Most summer camps are about fun and games, but Farmer’s camp is different. His camp is about teaching kids how to work, and parents are sending their kids in droves.

Families are super busy these days- school, sports, church, vacation, etc. This causes problems with many kids, because their parents don’t have time to teach them how to work and how to do basic stuff around the house. So, a lot of kids these days don’t have a good work ethic, and they’re as soft as tissue paper. Farmer’s summer camp is designed to help parents solve these problems for their kids.

Farmer said, “I thought about this summer work camp a few years ago, but I didn’t do anything about it. But, I had trouble finding help last year on the farm, and I didn’t get some stuff done because of it. My wife told me to start that summer camp so I could get some extra help on the farm, and she said that parents would probably pay you to teach them stuff. I decided to give it a go this summer, and parents are actually paying me a lot of money for them to come work on the farm. It’s free labor, and I get paid instead of having to pay them. It’s crazy.”

Farmer has a large farm with cattle, chickens, pigs, and he also has many acres of pine trees as well. His camp is one week long; parents drop their kids off on Monday and pick them up on Friday. Many kids aren’t happy when they’re dropped off, but most don’t want to leave on Friday. Farmer only has enough room for 10 kids at a time, and kids must be at least age 10. They learn a plethora of things, but the #1 aim for Farmer is to teach the kids to have a good work ethic. They have to get up at 6:00 am each morning, and they all eat breakfast together. Then, they get to work.

Farmer said, “Those first couple days are normally pretty rough for the kids, but they generally start to turn the corner on day 3. We talk about the importance of a good work ethic and a good attitude every day. I’m pretty tough on them, but they also learn how to think. On a farm, you learn how to get stuff done; you can’t always call someone to help, you just have to figure it out. Many kids struggle with that these days. I tell them Mom or Dad ain’t here to do it for you. You gotta figure it out. Normally, by day 3, they don’t want any help; they gain confidence and independence to do it themselves.”

Kids at Farmer’s camp learn how to do a plethora of things including cutting grass, feeding the animals, taking care of the animals, fixing fences, using a chainsaw, driving a vehicle, construction, cooking, and much more. Farmer’s favorite thing for the kids is hauling square bales of hay. Farmer said, “I love watching the kids handle the square bales. They absolutely hate it, but it teaches them grit and toughness. That’s what these kids need.”

You might think having these kids on the farm would hinder Farmer getting his work done, and it does at times. But, overall having the kids at camp helps him with many things that he wouldn’t get to otherwise. It also helps him with income. 10 kids per week at $300 a pop adds up over 10-11 weeks.

One parent said, “I was a little reluctant to send my son to Farmer’s camp, but I’m glad I did. He learned so much just in a week’s time, and his attitude at home is much better. Plus, he wants to go outside more instead of staying inside and playing games or watching tv. We’ll be sending him back next summer.”

One mom said, “I just didn’t know if my 11 year old son could cut it at farm camp. He’s a momma’s boy, and he lacks mental and physical toughness. Farmer is tough on the kids, and my son responded to it well. Plus, he learned a lot. He knows how to cut grass now, and he can even drive a vehicle now. He can’t wait to go back next summer.”

Farmer wants to have even more kids to his camp next summer. Parents love it, and the kids love it too. We’ll update you next summer on Farmer’s Farm Camp.

by “Stretch” DeTrooth

Valley City Country Club (VCCC) is normally a pretty quiet sleepy place. Things can get crazy when they have tournaments or wedding receptions, and things can heat up a bit on the weekends. Monday- Thursday is normally ho hum with the same 25-30 senior citizens playing in the mornings. Things have gotten interesting at the club recently though. A prankster, or some would say terrorist, has been lurking around the course, and the golfers are tired of him.

A young man with an air horn has been pranking golfers while they’re teeing off for a few weeks now. He generally sounds the air horn during players’ backswings, and the noise causes a bad shot. No one has been able to catch the prankster. He wears camo, and he’s always hidden behind trees or brush. After he sounds his air horn and he’s located, he runs off into the woods.

VCCC was carved out of the forest, so the club is basically surrounded by woods. This has provided cover for the prankster. Golfers have started looking for him, but you never know where he’s going to be. He can find cover on 11 or 12 of the 18 holes on the course.

The prankster, nicknamed the Backswing Bandit, has even started a Facebook page sharing videos of his pranks, and he’s already obtained over 2,500 followers. The club members were mad, but the creation of the Facebook page has made many members irate. Many members have seen videos of themselves being pranked, and they’re not happy about it.

One club member said, “This is not funny. I guess he thinks he’s Johnny Knoxville in Jackass. This punk needs to be caught, and needs to be tarred and feathered. I can’t even enjoy a nice round of golf now because I’m worried I’m going to hear that air horn on any backswing. We’re gonna catch this golf terrorist.”

Another member said, “I’m gonna be honest. I think it’s funny. He’s gotten all my buddies except me, and they were all so mad. He’ll probably get me at some point. I kind of wish I would’ve came up with the idea myself. Some of these stiff old timers need to relax a little.”

VCCC doesn’t know what they’re going to do to stop the prankster. Will they offer a reward for information? The more time that goes by it seems the prankster gets more brash and bold. The SRVO will let you know about any developments with the Backswing Bandit.